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the Joke thread.......

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    plastroncafe
    Alpha-Lantern

  • plastroncafe
    replied
    One of my favorite jokes of all time:

    How many Feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

    That's not funny.

    Leave a comment:

  • Kuhan
    Moderator

  • Kuhan
    replied
    I have no grievances.



    Said the Actress to the Bishop.

    Leave a comment:

  • Abin Surly
    or ewe sirius

  • Abin Surly
    replied
    Originally posted by sylent_asassin View Post
    Oh, for the love of... There should be a "VS." thread where you two and air your grievances.
    Why? Is it Festivus again already?

    Leave a comment:

  • projectile
    Sidekick

  • projectile
    replied
    Originally posted by sylent_asassin View Post
    Oh, for the love of... There should be a "VS." thread where you two and air your grievances.
    With a poll!

    Leave a comment:

  • Sylent_Asassin
    Black Lantern

  • Sylent_Asassin
    replied
    Oh, for the love of... There should be a "VS." thread where you two CAN air your grievances.
    Sylent_Asassin
    Black Lantern
    Last edited by Sylent_Asassin; 02-15-2012, 07:54 PM.

    Leave a comment:

  • Kuhan
    Moderator

  • Kuhan
    replied
    no, you posted many Qward type images and threads and I warned you about them.

    The Jewerine photo wasn't offensive. It was a guy in a Wolverine costume with a menorah strapped to his hand.

    You posted a photo that implied that a dog was fucking a man while he was praying.

    Do you see a difference?

    If you make a non-offensive joke, I let it slide. I don't care. I crack on Islam all the time.

    If you make an offensive comment, I don't let it slide. I still don't care, but others do. Unfortunately, this is not your playground. It is a public discussion forum.

    You like Wil Wheaton, right? Because Wil Wheaton has one rule: Don't be a dick (It's okay to play one on TV though.) Maybe listen to your friend Wil once in a while.

    Leave a comment:

  • TazzMission
    Guardian of the Universe

  • TazzMission
    replied
    Originally posted by Kuhan View Post
    I banned you for those photos because they belonged in Qward and you didn't seem to get it after I told you 10 times.
    thats a load of bullshit and you know it.

    i have posted so many qward type images and yet no one bitched about it


    i make one little crack on islam and boom gone for 10 days.


    do you hear doc make an excuse for a jewish photo i posted yesterday titled jewerine or a jewish slavery photo i posted ? no you dont


    every other religion is ok to crack on but islam isnt.


    go's to show why islam is looked in a bad light because they cant take a joke

    Leave a comment:

  • projectile
    Sidekick

  • projectile
    replied
    Okay so the first part I said was true.





    An elderly woman went to her local doctor’s office and asked to speak with her doctor. When the receptionist asked why she was there, she replied, “I’d like to have some birth control pills.”

    Taken back, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, “Excuse me, Mrs. Glenwood, but you’re 80 years old. What would you possibly need birth control pills for?”

    The woman replied, “They help me sleep better.”

    The doctor considered this for a second, and continued… “How in the world do birth control pills help you sleep?”

    The woman said, “I put them in my granddaughter’s orange juice, and I sleep better at night.”

    Leave a comment:

  • plastroncafe
    Alpha-Lantern

  • plastroncafe
    replied
    Nice one Razor!
    Tazz, your jokes aren't as funny. Might want to see to that.

    Leave a comment:

  • Kuhan
    Moderator

  • Kuhan
    replied
    I banned you for those photos because they belonged in Qward and you didn't seem to get it after I told you 10 times.


    A Haryanavi peasant was wlaking down the road carrying a heavy sack of grain on his head. A kindly Sardar farmer drawing his bullock-cart offered him a lift. The Haryanavi gratefully accepted the offer and sat down in the cart but kept the sack on his head.

    "Chaudhury, why don't you put down the sack in the gadda?"

    "Sardarji," replied the Haryanavi, "your cart is already heavily loaded. I don't want to put more burden on your poor bullock."



    See? It's funny because Sardars are stupid!

    Leave a comment:

  • TazzMission
    Guardian of the Universe

  • TazzMission
    replied
    Originally posted by projectile View Post
    In Kuhan's defense.

    You kept on posting qward related pics in the picture thread. Even when you were told to stop, you kept on going showing defiance and not listening to the mod/rules. Thats what you got banned for.

    I saw only 1 person come to your defense which was Darth Andrea, and she only thought you got banned for an Islam pic.
    check qward and the thread titled drones in us to monitor citizens and picture thread 7.

    a few others spoke up as well

    cylon 13 for example is one

    Leave a comment:

  • Razorgod
    Anti-Monitor

  • Razorgod
    replied
    A woman takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work.

    One day, her 9-year-old son hides in the closet during one of her romps. Her husband comes home unexpectedly, so she hides the lover in the closet.

    The little boy says, "It's dark in here."
    The man whispers, "Yes, it is."
    Boy - "I have a baseball."
    Man - "That's nice."
    Boy - "Want to buy it?"
    Man - "No, thanks."
    Boy - "My dad's outside."
    Man - "OK, how much?"
    Boy - "$250."

    In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the mom's lover end up in the closet together.

    Boy - "It's dark in here."
    Man - "Yes, it is."
    Boy - "I have a baseball glove."
    Man - Remembering last time, asks, "How much?"
    Boy - "$750."
    Man - "Fine."

    A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your ball and glove. Let's go outside and toss the baseball."

    The boy says, "I can't. I sold them."

    The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?"

    The son says "$1,000."

    The father says, "It's terrible to overcharge your friends like that. That's way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."

    They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and he closes the door.

    The boy says, "It's dark in here."
    The priest says, "Don't start that crap again!"

    Leave a comment:

  • plastroncafe
    Alpha-Lantern

  • plastroncafe
    replied
    One balmy evening in Rome the Pope decides to take a walk.
    He slips out the rear door of the Vatican and is walking
    through the back alleys of Rome when he sees a ten-year-old
    boy smoking a cigarette. The Pope gently says to him, "Young
    man, you're much too young to smoke!"

    The kid looks up at the Pope and says, "Fuck you!"

    The Pope is completely taken aback. "What?" he says. "You say
    that to *me*, the Pontiff, the Vicar of Christ, the head of
    the Roman Catholic Church? I am the spiritual leader for
    millions of people, young man, the representative of God,
    and you dare to say that to *me*? No, no, no, kid, fuck *YOU*!"

    Leave a comment:

  • projectile
    Sidekick

  • projectile
    replied
    Originally posted by TazzMission View Post
    you banning me for those photos says otherwise and you even admitted you are bias on the islam thing

    you also had 3 to 4 other people telling you the same thing wich was you over reacted.

    but i guess since we arent what you call a dictatorship like how you called this forum our opinions dont matter right?
    In Kuhan's defense.

    You kept on posting qward related pics in the picture thread. Even when you were told to stop, you kept on going showing defiance and not listening to the mod/rules. Thats what you got banned for.

    I saw only 1 person come to your defense which was Darth Andrea, and she only thought you got banned for an Islam pic.

    Leave a comment:

  • Razorgod
    Anti-Monitor

  • Razorgod
    replied
    Of course it's a dictatorship...this board is someone's property and the mods are conservators of that property. YOU are a guest. If you don't like the food, go home.

    Leave a comment:

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