Last film you saw, vol. 6

[Mister.Weirdo Guardian of the Universe Find all posts View Profile Close Mister.Weirdo]

Saw this as a live screening at the Dartmouth College. Was fun!

[Space Cop The Dandy Find all posts View Profile Close Space Cop]

Godzilla (1954)

"I can't believe that Godzilla was the only surviving member of its species."

[GLJIMT Moderator Find all posts View Profile Close GLJIMT]

Spider Man Far From Home

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The Equalizer (2014)

"Change your world."

Walt: The Man Behind the Myth (2001)

"I'm afraid we're just going to have to say 'Walt Disney: genius. Period."

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Bad Times At The El Royale (2018)

[Space Cop The Dandy Find all posts View Profile Close Space Cop]

[Rifftrax:] Godzilla (1998/2014)

"Before Michael ever Bayed there was Roland Emmerich."

Watchmen (2009)

"It's all a joke. Mother forgive me."

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Us (2019)

[markwood007788 Corps Recruit Find all posts View Profile Close markwood007788]

I saw the last movie a harry potter and This is my favorite movie.

[Mister.Weirdo Guardian of the Universe Find all posts View Profile Close Mister.Weirdo]

Rare to see a movie about The Jewish experience in such detail. Good stuff.

[Agent Purple The Illustrated Man Find all posts View Profile Close Agent Purple]

Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017)

"Darling, if you save the world, you can have a backstage pass."

Almost as good as the original, believe it or not. I loved Elton John in it, he was goddamn hilarious, you get some good fight scenes, and of course, good liquor and fine clothing.

I wasn't sure about bringing back Colin Firth, but it was well done, and goddamn that memory trigger scene was intense.

Definitely worth checking out, and looking forward to the third film.

[Space Cop The Dandy Find all posts View Profile Close Space Cop]

Charlie's Angels (2000)

"That man's got a beautiful phone voice."

MST3K: The Giant Gila Monster (1959/1992)

"The whole town revolves around the towing industry."

Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017)...Almost as good as the original, believe it or not. I loved Elton John in it, he was goddamn hilarious, you get some good fight scenes, and of course, good liquor and fine clothing...

I was pleasantly surprised with that one. Bringing Firth back felt so gimmicky, but it was just fun.

[Agent Purple The Illustrated Man Find all posts View Profile Close Agent Purple]

I didn't like the dinner scene, though. It was almost good, but then ruined by the whole "yelling at the wrong person" gag. Everything would have been just as effective or better by just having Eggsy make a good impression on Tilde's parents and then coming home to ruins.

[Space Cop The Dandy Find all posts View Profile Close Space Cop]

The Giant Spider (2013)

"Spider pheromones don't fail me now."

Attack of the Giant Teacher (2019)

"We want to do a musical!"

This fun ultra-independent/low-budget kaiju flick made its world debut at G-Fest with the writer/director (and one of the actresses) introducing and closing it.

[Agent Purple The Illustrated Man Find all posts View Profile Close Agent Purple]

Malibu Express (1985)

"Sugar, I'm the fastest thing on the lot."

Cody Abilene, special investigator, is sent to investigate suspicious activity at a ritzy manor, where an ex-con chauffeur is deeply in debt and blackmailing to pay off his creditor. At the same time, another special agent is investigating activity of unethical persons selling American computers to the Soviets. When the chauffeur is murdered, Abilene must use all of his wit and daring to solve the killing.

This is nowhere near as good as Hard Ticket to Hawaii, but damn if it isn't just as wildly entertaining.

Here's a rundown of some of the highlights:

* Abilene goes to the Agency's shooting range with a .44 revolver, which he carries in a briefcase that, I shit you not, has fake cow print on it (white exterior with awkwardly-cut black patches to imitate the pattern); this briefcase also shows up in Picasso Trigger, which I'm watching right now

* Abilene goes to his yacht where he's ambushed by his new neighbors, who immediately have sex with him

* The manor's female servant is Maid Marion, and she has hair like Dee Snyder never got it cut

* Abilene's father beat a redneck in a race years ago, and the redneck and his family have been out for payback ever since. They force Abilene to race but after their surprise victory, the son admits to the dad that he used a special formula. He then pulls out a large moonshine jar with a glowing orange fluid that's giving off more smoke than Mount St. Helen, and says it gives 20 seconds of rocket fuel before exploding. His car engine then bursts into flames. By the way, the son looks like the original Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies, the mom looks like Mimi from The Drew Carrey Show, and the dad looks like Drew Carrey's twin brother stopped giving a shit.

* The chauffeur video tapes himself having sex with various women to use as blackmail, and he basically takes pictures while he rapes a woman in the shower. I honestly was stunned by this, because it went from schlock to straight horror pretty fucking fast.

* The one manor resident looks like David Hyde Pierce, and is a crossdresser, but then he tells the chauffeur to fuck off when the bastard tries to blackmail him for funds

* Abilene is attacked by thugs and left in the desert where he finds a used car lot, the saleswoman working there is the easiest lay I've seen in ages (it's where I got the quote from)

* Abilene can't hit a target the entire film except for twice pretty late into things. This goes from a joke trait to being pretty fucking stupid because multiple times he's in gunfights but cannot hit guys five feet away from him

I'll leave it there because shit is just weird. It isn't as polished as Hard Ticket, frankly all the sex makes the film worse and I'm pretty sure that writer/director Andy Sidaris had a serious porn career before getting into schlock action flicks with Malibu Express.

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Rim Of The World (2019)