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Old 11-13-2019, 02:39 PM   #8151
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Ah, again, you guys are making me bunch up my movies (this is days worth):

[Rifftrax:] Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011)

"How does a robot get fat?"

Wolves (2014)

"Wolves don't terrorize towns."

My full moon movie this month. Better than I was expecting since I didn't remember seeing anything about it.

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)

"Damn, that ninja's fast."

G.I. Joe: Retaliation (2013)

"Anyone ever tell you, you fight ugly?
-Not from their backs, they don't."
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Old 11-13-2019, 09:29 PM   #8152
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Doctor Sleep Review.

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Old 11-14-2019, 03:58 AM   #8153
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Toy Story 2 (1999)

"I'm packing you an extra pair of shoes, and your angry eyes, just in case."

Can you believe even the sequel is 20 years old now?! I remember seeing this in theater (while in college).

Doctor Sleep (2019)

"The world's a hungry place. A dark place."

The Jack Bull (1999)

"Trouble is, there's not enough of us important people to go around - we're spread thin, so sometimes, important things get ignored or don't get said. Like take care of the little feller."

A friend recommended this twenty-year-old HBO movie written by Cusack's father and directed by John Badham. Good cast and story.

Jimi Hendrix: Voodoo Child (2010)

"When I die, just keep on playing the records."

This was interesting because it was entirely from Hendrix's letters or other writings (plus a couple clips of vintage interviews) narrated by an actor with footage. So, you just get his interpretation of his life and career.

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The only thing I would question is whether it's more of an adaptation of the book than a sequel to the movie. I haven't read Doctor Sleep yet, but I went with my mother---who has---and read an article about the differences and there are a lot. The fact that they start with the hotel still around and Dick dead makes it clear it serves as a sequel to Kubrick. I really can't think of any story element that couldn't serve as a direct sequel to the movie and they changed multiple plot points to rework the ending in those terms including different people dying. They even reuse and allude to the music frequently. And they go with the 237 numbering instead of 217, which seems to be the first thing King fans point to.
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Old 11-15-2019, 06:11 AM   #8154
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Spider-Man: Far From Home (2019)

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Old 11-15-2019, 11:38 PM   #8155
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Black Dynamite (2009)

"Because donuts don't wear alligator shoes."

Planet 51

"You're a great planet, and your 50's are fine, but give me a call when get to the 60's, 'cause that's gonna be fun."

Turned 10 last night and while it's neither a movie nor an anniversary that I'd particularly note, it was a good excuse to re-watch it.
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Old 11-16-2019, 07:05 AM   #8156
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American Sniper (2014)

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Old 11-16-2019, 01:40 PM   #8157
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Disco Godfather (1979)

“Move and I'll blow your Afro off!”

Santo and the Vengeance of the Mummy (1971)

“Fear is a b**ch, Santo.”
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—Isaiah 9:6

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Old 11-17-2019, 02:40 AM   #8158
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Sherlock Holmes: The Scarlet Claw (1944)

"I've fallen in another hole!"

Holmes (Basil Rathbone) and Watson (Nigel Bruce) are visiting Quebec, Canada, when news of a murder reaches them. They receive a letter from the deceased that she believed her life in danger and investigate, learning that a phantom is murdering people in a small village.

I discovered this on YouTube and was trying to watch it on my own, but since Netflix decided to be slow as fuck again, I took the opportunity to watch this with my dad, who admits he either has never seen it or it's been several decades.

I love the atmosphere in the film, this eerie little town that the studio creates just looks ominous and ripe for unearthly goings-on. The characters are a real treat, with Rathbone playing a razor-witted Holmes, Bruce playing the oafish-but-affable Watson, and the Postman (Gerald Hamer) being much like an early version of Marvel's Willie Lumkin from the Fantastic Four.

The plot and pacing of the film are solid, and the film is only a little over an hour long (free on YouTube, a quick and fun way to kill time). I'm going to have to check out the Voice of Fear film that was suggested sometime in the near future.
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Old 11-18-2019, 11:51 PM   #8159
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Captain Marvel (2019)

"Why would I turn into a filing cabinet?"

Blade Runner (1982/1992)

"There's only two of us now.
-Then we're stupid and we'll die."

Watched it because we're at the month (and I was planning to do so before seeing the Rental Reviews episode). I haven't seen the sequel yet, but I did hear that it identifies the Rachel interview as Nov. 20. That day won't be convenient to watch with the family, so we did tonight. Heck, maybe it's the date of Leon's escape.
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For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
—Isaiah 9:6

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Old 11-19-2019, 07:04 AM   #8160
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My Parasite review.

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Old 11-21-2019, 04:10 PM   #8161
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Hitch-Hike (1977)

"What if they make a movie of it?"

Mandy (2018)

"You are a vicious snowflake."

Not sure how I feel about this. I wanted to love it and I didn't hate it, but it was weird and not what I was expecting.
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For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
—Isaiah 9:6

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Old 11-22-2019, 05:56 AM   #8162
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The Secret Life Of Pets 2 (2019)

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Old 11-22-2019, 02:58 PM   #8163
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The Black Cauldron (1985)

"Are you a lord, or a warrior?
-I'm an assistant pig keeper."

While not great, this was better than I expected, but I have no knowledge of the books.

Back to the Future II (1989)

"The time-traveling is just too dangerous. Better that I devote myself to study the other great mystery of the universe: women!"

Watched last night for the 30th anniversary. I remember seeing this in theaters (one of the first I went to with just my stepdad) and being surprised by the announcement that #3 would be that summer. Of course, we're now well past the 'future' of 2015 and still no airlanes for flying cars and no dehydrated pizza. Interestingly, the joke about there being over 250 channels on their TV is now lowballing it!
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For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
—Isaiah 9:6

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Old 11-22-2019, 05:47 PM   #8164
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I really want to check out the Black Cauldron now that I have Disney +. I love some of the more off-the-best Disney stuff; Bed-knobs and Broomsticks anyone?
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Old 11-22-2019, 05:56 PM   #8165
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Petey Wheatstraw (1977)

"Let's bury this fool!"

Boyhood (2014)

"You think they ever will make another Star Wars?
-I don't know. I mean I think if they were to make another one that the period where this game is set is where it would have to be because there's nothing after, really.
No, Return of the Jedi is over. There's nothing.
-Yeah, there's nothing else to do there."

Heard about this when it was coming out. Glad I finally saw it. I always wondered why people hadn't tried it before (a fictional drama charting a kid's growth). Turns out, people have done really long productions but in different ways.

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Bed-knobs and Broomsticks anyone?
Loved it as a kid and to this day "Portobello Road" and "Beautiful Briney Sea" pop in my head randomly. Need to get a copy some day.

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For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
—Isaiah 9:6

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Old 11-22-2019, 08:06 PM   #8166
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Oh yes, the beautiful briny sea, that one sneaks into my head randomly.
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Old 11-22-2019, 08:09 PM   #8167
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Blackenstein [aka Black Frankenstein] (1973)

"I don't feel right."

Sonic the Hedgehog: The Movie (1996/9)

"Just give up! We've played a hundred times already!"
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For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
—Isaiah 9:6

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Old 11-22-2019, 09:21 PM   #8168
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That poster looks like the film is having an identity crisis between being a horror spoof and being a porno with monster masks on the dudes.
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Old 11-23-2019, 01:12 AM   #8169
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Don't Cry, It's Only Thunder (1982)

"In my country, they have no time to be kids."

Inspiring story of a medic in Vietnam who reluctantly takes over caring for some war orphans when his friend dies, but becomes obsessed with their welfare. Based on a true story I now want to read. The lead is played by the guy who played Eddie in the It miniseries and Robert Englund plays a pre-Freddy supporting role. This sorely needs a disc release (I Youtubed it).

[Rifftrax:] Samurai Cop (1991/2016)

"The teddy bears in the background let us know Joe is secretly eight years old."

Literally made me laugh until my side hurt. Great riff.

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That poster looks like the film is having an identity crisis between being a horror spoof and being a porno with monster masks on the dudes.
Yeah, that's just an exploitation thing. It has topless parts and such, but not more than others in the genre. It's sort of a horror spoof, but not Brooks or Abrahams-level. I'd recommend it more for fans of blaxploitation and grindhouse than horror or horror comedy (it's not exactly hilarious). Blacula is like Citizen Kane compared to this, but that's part of the fun if you can dig that, turkey.
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For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
—Isaiah 9:6

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Old 11-23-2019, 05:22 AM   #8170
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Toy Story 4 (2019)

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Old 11-24-2019, 12:30 AM   #8171
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Cats (1998)

"It's so easy to leave me all alone with the memory of my days in the sun."

Salò, or the 120 Days of Sodom (1975)

"We Fascists are the only true anarchists, naturally, once we're masters of the state. In fact, the one true anarchy is that of power."

Definitely don't recommend to most people and it didn't have a clear ending, but since it's one of those that makes the lists of sickest movies, I "had" to at least see it once. An adaptation of de Sade where four powerful people in fascist N. Italy abuse and torture 9 young men and 9 young women while 4 older prostitutes narrate depravities. Weird. Lots of obvious gross outs.
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For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
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Old 11-24-2019, 08:24 PM   #8172
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Mr. Majestyk (1974)

"Hey buddy, you goin' to eat those sausages?"

"Hey buddy. Like I told you, you're in the wrong industry."

So I finally got in this revered classic. How does it hold up? Well and not-so-well.

I've long heard about Bronson's acting being pretty good, and he is a very good actor here. He plays a pretty average-looking older guy who is world-weary and confident, nothing cocksure about him and with a damn friendly face. Great voice, too. I liked Death Wish (1975) with him, that was a great film, and at some point I'll see the original version (and probably the remake) of The Mechanic.

To be clear, Bronson isn't at fault here. He's very relatable in this film, an honest farmer who just wants to be left well enough alone and pick his crop. When I saw the trailer a little while back, I could have sworn that Paul Koslo's racketeer character, Bobby Kopas, was the main villain, but nope, it's really profession hit man Frank Renda (Al Lettieri, whom I first saw in The Getaway opposite Steve McQueen). Lettieri is great here, ruthless and menacing, an old-hand killer for sure.

Lee Purcell also seems familiar, but I checked her credits and I don't think I've ever seen her before.

Koslo is hilarious inept as Kopas, who at first seems like he might be the hot-shot subordinate of a racketeering boss but it turns out he's just a too-big-for-his-britches thug with a small crew of even-dumber thugs following him. This makes Lettieri's interactions with him borderline comedy gold, because Lettieri's Renda is clearly not in the mood for an amateur like Kopas constantly dropping the ball.

Taylor Lacher as Gene Lundy is a solid support, and he does some serious work during the jailbreak scene, racing around and jumping over cars to bust Renda out. Almost amusing how his loyalty doesn't pay off in the end.

Linda Cristal was surprisingly good as Nancy Chavez (I actually understood her "not related to the other Chavez" remark as meaning Cesar Chavez), and how can you not at least like Alejandro Rey's Larry Mendoza? Dude's a buddy.

The factor I really didn't care for was the police. Damn near everything about them was what lowered this film. I get the "suspension of disbelief" and that the protagonist, especially in an action film, has to be against overwhelming odds, but sweet baby Jesus, the cops here was borderline brainless. Frank Maxwell as Lt. Detective McAllen certainly wasn't a bad actor, but he was acting out some atrocious ideas and making it clear he has no idea how basic tactics or evidence work (suspicious dude claims he was beaten and menaced with a gun? Only witnesses are his friends? Automatic jail time despite the accused being a longtime resident with no prior local history of crime, case closed; McAllen also doesn't seem to know how to put a watch on Bronson or how to have the target of a crime followed). Beyond him, why is law enforcement in this film so kneecapped? Renda is wanted on charges of paid murder, he's been sought before, and then there's a big and deadly jailbreak and he's only expected to make a court date? Cops at the bar but they don't immediately arrest his ass? What the flying fuck?

But you know what was genuinely great? The action. The aforementioned jailbreak, the big chase with the old pickup truck, even the tense hunter-hunted scene at the secluded woodland house, all have some great stuff in them (that truck must have been worked to the nines, because holy shit does it do stunt work!). Film is definitely worth checking out for those bits.

So while I don't think I'll go out of my way to purchase this, I do have to recommend it as a classic tough-guy flick.
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Old 11-25-2019, 03:15 PM   #8173
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North Star (1996)

"My ancestors taught me you cannot own the land, you can only respect it."

Legendary (2013)

"Aim for the mouth."

Okay flick with cheap CGI. Adkins and Lundgren are competing cryptozoologists who fall out over a giant bear incident and then take different approaches on a giant amphibian plaguing a water plant in China.


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Brightburn (2019)
"Take the world."

Really dug this one. I don't know that I agree with the makers that it's the first superhero horror because I would say that there's a strong element of that in Chronicle and it's implicit in crossover comic character movies like Blade, Vampirella, Constantine, Spawn, and Ghostrider. The originality (which they didn't seem to want to spell out in the promos) was making the Superman story a horror story (heck, it's even in Kansas!).

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Mr. Majestyk (1974)...
I know I saw this one and basically dug it, but don't remember the deets enough to interact. According to Netflix, I saw it in 2013 and gave it a middle-of-the-road 3 stars.
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Old 11-25-2019, 11:41 PM   #8174
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Forgot to mention during my review, but the plan Bronson comes up with to turn in Lettieri is unbelievably stupid and overly complicated and risky as hell. The one single thing that was bright about it was he wanted to deliver Lettieri to the cops so they couldn't claim discovery and screw him again. Beyond that, he dropped the fucking ball.
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Old 11-27-2019, 03:00 PM   #8175
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[Rifftrax:] Beyond Christmas [aka Beyond Tomorrow] (1940/2017)

"He's singing, but he's wishing he were in bed tweeting about depression."

[Rifftrax:] Magic Christmas Tree (2011)

"Voted town's flattest head three years running."

[Rifftrax:] Ice Cream Man (1995/2018)

"Clint Howard: the Clint Howard of brothers."
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